The month of October had me feeling headless, emotionally strung out & eventually seeking self-evaluation. Me, in general, has always had a lot of work to do. I grew up annoyingly on the defense, outspoken & overly sensitive. I love people. I love people hard. Too hard sometimes. Hard in the sense of wanting to shake people lose of their insecurities, doubts & fears; in the sense of already knowing what they’re capable of; in the sense of knowing what the wind will feel like on their face when they decide to fly. If they will only choose to release & fly.
The key word: choose.
We are all given choices. Pastor Groeschel spoke yesterday on The Time is Now. He spoke about how we come onto moments in our life where something is weighing on our heart, possibly a calling, and rather than acting on it we stumble upon opposition. We possibly choose the “easy wrong” over the “hard right”.
To write is a calling pressed upon my heart. It is the greatest joy for me and yet a discipline as well. It is a discipline because my opposition is T I M E. The easy wrong for me in writing is choosing my cell phone, choosing to sleep the extra hour & not being intentional about designating time.
Time is so sacred. Our choices are equally sacred. The daily choices of whom, what, when, where, how.
I am in a season of intentional sharpening. Daily, I am seeking ways to refine my mind, actions & words; I am looking to point the finger at myself before ever looking around; I am eager to hug people amidst their joys & concerns but rather than wearing the struggles of others allowing God to be God and trusting in the power of prayer versus my own strength, words & actions.
I am in a season of looking at the fall leaves and beyond color, seeing life & transformation. I am in a season of slowing down, absorbing the little things & working on my inner flicker, light & passion.
I am thankful for this season; it is equally inspirational & polishing. It has been a beautiful fall. The winter months will surely uncover its own beauty.